Saturday, March 24, 2012

Kids say the darndest things

So, yeah, it's been more than a month since my last update and I’m really sorry about that.  On the bright side, though, this post is going to be packed full of a whole lot of awesomeness!  So much has happened during the last month that you would hate me if I wrote about all of it and actually expected you to read it.  Instead, this post will be about all of the adorable things my students and Chinese friends have said/done recently.

Yesterday, I informed one of my classes that they have an exam next week.  Since they don't know the word "exam" I said in Chinese "kǎoshì" (exam); the entire class broke into applause and were cheering and simply couldn't believe that this white chick from America just spoke Chinese!  There is no other place in the world that students would applaud after hearing they have an upcoming exam.

I played a review game with my students and included some pictures of my family in the PowerPoint.  I pointed out my dad in one of the pictures, and a couple of the boys said, "Woah, he is SO cool!" and "He is rockstar!"  Here's the picture that deemed my father a rockstar:

One of the words I'm teaching my students is "restaurant".  For some reason they have a really hard time with this word.  When I showed them a picture and asked what it was, I got all kinds of responses, but my favorites were: "ru-ru-ru-ressienot", "eating shop" and "eat hamburger store".

March 5th was my co-teacher's birthday.  I handed her a card I'd made and she asked what it was for; I said, "Today is your birthday, yes?"  She explained that Chinese people celebrate their birthdays on the Lunar New Year, which I already knew, so I clarified, "It is the day of your birth, yes?"  She then said, "sān yuè wǔ hào" (March 5th).  I very humbly replied, "Jīntiān shì sān yuè wǔ hào" (Today is March 5th).  This was followed by a very long pause, then she looked over at the calendar, did some math on her fingers, and a shocked look appeared on her face, "OH! Today is my birthday!"

Last week I completely lost my voice.  I wasn't able to teach a couple classes because I couldn't speak above a whisper and when I attempted to use a microphone the class, including my co-teacher, couldn't stop laughing.  Later in the week I walked to class and a student stopped me in the hallway, placed one hand on her throat and the other on mine, and whispered, "Have speaking?"  When I replied, "Yes, I can speak.", she clapped and hugged me and kissed her hand then touched my throat again and escorted me to class. 

The teachers and their families eat in a cafeteria on campus.  One of my class masters has a toddler that she eats lunch with everyday.  This child is absolutely terrified of the foreign teachers, specifically the white female foreign teachers.  Every day during lunch, if we're sitting in the same room as this kid, he spends the whole meal demonstrating his disdain for us!  If we look at him, he covers his eyes or puts his head down.  If we make faces or try to play with him, he turns completely around in his chair until his back is to us.  Yesterday, no joke, he turned around in his seat for a full 10 minutes and refused to eat or talk or look at his mother until we left.  His mom and grandma have both tried to intervene, but even my teammate's co-teacher had to admit, "He is a very happy baby, he likes everyone... but maybe, maybe he does not like you."  If it wasn't so incredibly amusing, I think my feelings would be a bit hurt.

Today I tried an experiment.  I needed to go to the supermarket, but I was in one of those moods where I just didn't feel like being the foreigner-celebrity of Taiyuan.  So I decided to try a tactic that another foreign teacher at our school uses every time she leaves campus; I covered every part of skin and hair I possibly could, even though it was in the 60's and sunny.  Then I walked to Meet-All.  Not a single person looked at me!  It was like I was totally invisible, even when I went in the store and talked to a couple of people, no one knew I was a foreigner!  The difference between today and a normal trip to the store was the most astounding thing- I kid you not, typically every single person we walk by will pause and stare at us, several will say any English words they've ever heard, and some might stop to take pictures or a video.  Today: nothing.  I almost didn't know what to do with myself, I'm so used to being constantly on display.  Here's a picture of my disguise:

Oh China, you are certainly never boring :-)